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Disclaimers: I don't own them. Used without permission.
Thanks to Nicole and Mouse for beta and handholding. Always. ;-)
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Sometimes I feel I'm going under
You don't feel nothing at all
--from Sparkle & Shine by Econoline Crush
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There he goes again, giving me That Look. Yeah Joe, I know you want me. Everybody in the fucking room probably knows it by now. He thinks he's keeping secrets? What am I thinking? He probably doesn't give a flying fuck what anyone thinks. That's the beauty of being Joe Dick, not worrying about what anyone thinks of you.
On some level, I admire that...probably more than I should...but it also pisses me off to know that he doesn't even care what I think most of the time. If he does, he sure doesn't show it. It's gotta be his way or the highway, and fuck anybody who gets in his way. And sometimes I even admire that too, even when I'm the one gettin' fucked over.
He treats me like a pet and I just...I let him. I hate it and I love it and I hate him and I love him. How sick is that? He only does what I allow him to get away with. He's always pushing the boundaries. Saying, come on, Billy, don't be pussy, you want it, Billy... No, yeah, maybe, I don't know, dammit what are you doing to me, Joe?
And will you do it again? Soon, tonight, now. He's holding back to see what I'll do, watching and wearing his thoughts on his face. Maybe not...what if he doesn't want me as much as I think he does? Maybe he's thinking about something else and just happens to be looking my way. Fucker. Why can't you ever make things easy, Joe? Just come out and say it, you contrary son of a bitch.
But he won't. He wants me to make the first move even though he knows how much I hate it. Come on, Billy, jump through the fuckin' hoop, like a good dog. Won't be too hard to pick a fight with him tonight. Nah, just get him outside first because there's no need for everyone in here to witness our...foreplay. Pushing, shoving, a little love tap or two--just to show affection, don't you know?
I get so tired of having to go through all this bullshit, but I don't know any other way to be with Joe. We each play our parts, because if we don't what have we got? Not a fuckin' thing.
The End.